Q. that all babies around 7 or 8 months old develop this separation anxiety thing, and when other people besides their mom and dad want to hold them, they scream. This particular baby we are talking about, his father is from Cambodia, and believes in "spanking" this infant to make it go to sleep. Also, he believes this baby should have no toys. Whats up with this? And, what's up with this baby screaming whenever she goes to someone new? My kids never did that. They laughed and smiled whoever they went to, and pulled on their glasses or necklace or beard.
A. Wow...
First, separation anxiety is a real thing. Infants do develop it typically in that time period. Before that, when a trusted adult leaves in the infants mind they cease to exist. But, around 8-10 months they begin to realize that when the adult leaves that they are still out there somewhere. It is really a big milestone in development.
Cultural beliefs are hard to overcome sometimes. However, it is never appropriate to spank, shake, or physically discipline an infant. He can do irreparable damage even when not intending to do so. Suggest other methods to help the infant go to sleep. I do not believe in allowing infants to cry themselves to sleep (commonly called crying it out or CIO), but it sounds like CIO may be a better option for this family.
Infants do need toys to learn about their environment, but most important is an adult to introduce the world to them.
Crying when other people hold her is another typical developmental milestone. It is called stranger anxiety. Very normal!
First, separation anxiety is a real thing. Infants do develop it typically in that time period. Before that, when a trusted adult leaves in the infants mind they cease to exist. But, around 8-10 months they begin to realize that when the adult leaves that they are still out there somewhere. It is really a big milestone in development.
Cultural beliefs are hard to overcome sometimes. However, it is never appropriate to spank, shake, or physically discipline an infant. He can do irreparable damage even when not intending to do so. Suggest other methods to help the infant go to sleep. I do not believe in allowing infants to cry themselves to sleep (commonly called crying it out or CIO), but it sounds like CIO may be a better option for this family.
Infants do need toys to learn about their environment, but most important is an adult to introduce the world to them.
Crying when other people hold her is another typical developmental milestone. It is called stranger anxiety. Very normal!
Tips on surviving an International flight with an infant?
Q. In a few days my husband, our 8 month old son and I are going to be on a 14 hour International flight. Any tips on surviving the flight? I am having a hard time getting excited about the trip because I am so worried about the long flight! Any advice from those who have "been there, done that"?
A. I'm a former Flight Attendant and I now fly a lot with my own three children. We usually travel between Europe and California about twice a year.
Seven months is actually a good age to travel. It gets trickier when they can run! You may have him crawling all over the place but for the most part, you'll be able to keep up with him.
I have never used any sort of medications to get my children to sleep on any of those flights. At that age especially, they do nodd off at some point of the journey, more if it's at night.
I also think he's too young for a portable DVD player. I got one when my youngest was 3 years old. They are kind of heavy to cart around and could easily break. How much screen watching does he do? Mine were not very interested, especially with a small screen, at that age.
Bring a few quiet toys but a small selection. Again, short attention spans and he'll be more interested in his new surroundings.
First of all, I really recommend bringing a car seat and using it onboard. Make sure your car seat is approved for use on aircraft. If you're flying on a U.S. company, see the below link for information on if it's approved. Most car seats, including infant buckets, sold in the U.S. are.
http://www.faa.gov/passengers/fly_children/crs/
If you are flying a non-U.S. company, see the information for your airline. If you search with the name of the airline, followed by "children", that will usually give you the right page.
This way, the seat will get to your destination without risking it being damaged or lost in luggage, a bigger risk than anything going wrong during the flight itself.
If you don't have a seat for him, request it at check-in. Ask if the flight is full, and if not, they can "block" the seat next to you, only using it if they really need it. They often do this for families.
Bring the seat to the gate, even if they are unsure that you'll get a seat. This way, if you don't manage it, they will "gate check" your seat, sending it down with the strollers and wheelchairs. This is gentlier than checking it in at the desk.
I also recommend trying to sit at the bulkhead. These are the seats with the wall in front, located in different places depending on the aircraft. Bulkheads are easier with children since no one is leaning in front of you and there's probably room to crawl on the floor.
If you have a travel system, you can use the stroller until you get to the door of the aircraft and then it'll be "gate checked". If not, use a stroller frame for a infant seat. You'll have it again, by the door of the aircraft when you arrive. If you have a convertible car seat (going to 40lbs), there are a number of contraptions you can use to wheel it around. I simply strap mine to a small metal luggage cart and that works great.
If you do have a stroller, bring a bungee cord and double secure it before leaving it at the door of the plane. They can get damaged if they pop open en route. Make sure the claim ticket can be seen and isn't squished or hidden. Be sure to ask when disembarking where the stroller is.
Bring at least 1/3 more diapers than you think you'll need. I saw so many parents run out on flights when I was working! Wrap them in plastic bags and throw a bunch of rubber bands around them to save room in your carry-on.
For a formula fed baby, I really recommend using the bottles with plastic liners. Traditional bottles are too difficult to wash onboard because of the kind of sinks on airplanes. I premeasured the powder and rolled them up, placing the rolls in a ziplock bag. Then I threw the liners away as I used them and only had the ring and nipple to clean.
If you use bottled water, make sure you have enough! The water on the aircraft is filtered tap so decide if you're comfortable using that for your baby. Bottled water runs out fast on flights and we never had any extra for baby bottles. Most security operations around the world will let liquids over the 3oz restrictions for those flying with babies.
Be sure your baby does not need the bottle warmed. Get him used to a room-temperature bottle before leaving. This is unnecessary health-wise and a real pain to do while traveling. I warmed many bottles on my flights but I wasn't there in the check-in line, the security line or the waiting area! Babies do great with room-temperature bottles.
Make sure you have at least one change of clothes. I would bring two. At that age, I simply dressed mine in sleep suits for flying. No one will care so keep him comfortable. Bring extra socks if he crawls so that he doesn't pick up anything nasty on the floor and to keep his hands clean.
Hopefully you have a good baby carrier. They're so useful for flying, especially at this age. I had a sling but other parents swear by their wraps and pouches. The Ergo and Beccos are other popular carriers for travel that go on the back.
I liked the sling because I could slide my babies from into and out of a stroller or car seat without waking them. It also doubled as a blanket, baby changer, breastfeeding cover-up and sunshade! My sling was magic for calming my babies during the flight. Other parents wanted one when they saw how easy it made my travels. Avoid front packs like the Bjorn since they're so bad for both the parents' and child's back. A good carrier should go to at least age 2.
Many flying tips say to make the child suck on something or drink during take-off and landing. This is actually a myth. I rarely saw ear problems in anyone in my 13 years of flying. ENT specialists say to have the child awake about an hour before landing (top of descent, landing or touch-down is too late). This is also the recommendation of the AAP:
http://www.entcda.com/AAOHNSF/earsandaltitude.htm
http://www.aap.org/patiented/flyingbaby.htm
Take your child to the doctor in the last few days before you fly to make sure his ears are clear and infection-free. Heathy ears can handle pressurization changes.
About 8 years ago, I wrote an article on flying with children for an expat newsletter. I later put it on a blog so that parents had access to non-commercial information from someone with both practical and professional experience on the web. Over the years I've expanded it, adding tips from parents around the world.
http://flyingwithchildren1.blogspot.com
Just be really prepared and that will be half the battle!
Have a good trip!
Seven months is actually a good age to travel. It gets trickier when they can run! You may have him crawling all over the place but for the most part, you'll be able to keep up with him.
I have never used any sort of medications to get my children to sleep on any of those flights. At that age especially, they do nodd off at some point of the journey, more if it's at night.
I also think he's too young for a portable DVD player. I got one when my youngest was 3 years old. They are kind of heavy to cart around and could easily break. How much screen watching does he do? Mine were not very interested, especially with a small screen, at that age.
Bring a few quiet toys but a small selection. Again, short attention spans and he'll be more interested in his new surroundings.
First of all, I really recommend bringing a car seat and using it onboard. Make sure your car seat is approved for use on aircraft. If you're flying on a U.S. company, see the below link for information on if it's approved. Most car seats, including infant buckets, sold in the U.S. are.
http://www.faa.gov/passengers/fly_children/crs/
If you are flying a non-U.S. company, see the information for your airline. If you search with the name of the airline, followed by "children", that will usually give you the right page.
This way, the seat will get to your destination without risking it being damaged or lost in luggage, a bigger risk than anything going wrong during the flight itself.
If you don't have a seat for him, request it at check-in. Ask if the flight is full, and if not, they can "block" the seat next to you, only using it if they really need it. They often do this for families.
Bring the seat to the gate, even if they are unsure that you'll get a seat. This way, if you don't manage it, they will "gate check" your seat, sending it down with the strollers and wheelchairs. This is gentlier than checking it in at the desk.
I also recommend trying to sit at the bulkhead. These are the seats with the wall in front, located in different places depending on the aircraft. Bulkheads are easier with children since no one is leaning in front of you and there's probably room to crawl on the floor.
If you have a travel system, you can use the stroller until you get to the door of the aircraft and then it'll be "gate checked". If not, use a stroller frame for a infant seat. You'll have it again, by the door of the aircraft when you arrive. If you have a convertible car seat (going to 40lbs), there are a number of contraptions you can use to wheel it around. I simply strap mine to a small metal luggage cart and that works great.
If you do have a stroller, bring a bungee cord and double secure it before leaving it at the door of the plane. They can get damaged if they pop open en route. Make sure the claim ticket can be seen and isn't squished or hidden. Be sure to ask when disembarking where the stroller is.
Bring at least 1/3 more diapers than you think you'll need. I saw so many parents run out on flights when I was working! Wrap them in plastic bags and throw a bunch of rubber bands around them to save room in your carry-on.
For a formula fed baby, I really recommend using the bottles with plastic liners. Traditional bottles are too difficult to wash onboard because of the kind of sinks on airplanes. I premeasured the powder and rolled them up, placing the rolls in a ziplock bag. Then I threw the liners away as I used them and only had the ring and nipple to clean.
If you use bottled water, make sure you have enough! The water on the aircraft is filtered tap so decide if you're comfortable using that for your baby. Bottled water runs out fast on flights and we never had any extra for baby bottles. Most security operations around the world will let liquids over the 3oz restrictions for those flying with babies.
Be sure your baby does not need the bottle warmed. Get him used to a room-temperature bottle before leaving. This is unnecessary health-wise and a real pain to do while traveling. I warmed many bottles on my flights but I wasn't there in the check-in line, the security line or the waiting area! Babies do great with room-temperature bottles.
Make sure you have at least one change of clothes. I would bring two. At that age, I simply dressed mine in sleep suits for flying. No one will care so keep him comfortable. Bring extra socks if he crawls so that he doesn't pick up anything nasty on the floor and to keep his hands clean.
Hopefully you have a good baby carrier. They're so useful for flying, especially at this age. I had a sling but other parents swear by their wraps and pouches. The Ergo and Beccos are other popular carriers for travel that go on the back.
I liked the sling because I could slide my babies from into and out of a stroller or car seat without waking them. It also doubled as a blanket, baby changer, breastfeeding cover-up and sunshade! My sling was magic for calming my babies during the flight. Other parents wanted one when they saw how easy it made my travels. Avoid front packs like the Bjorn since they're so bad for both the parents' and child's back. A good carrier should go to at least age 2.
Many flying tips say to make the child suck on something or drink during take-off and landing. This is actually a myth. I rarely saw ear problems in anyone in my 13 years of flying. ENT specialists say to have the child awake about an hour before landing (top of descent, landing or touch-down is too late). This is also the recommendation of the AAP:
http://www.entcda.com/AAOHNSF/earsandaltitude.htm
http://www.aap.org/patiented/flyingbaby.htm
Take your child to the doctor in the last few days before you fly to make sure his ears are clear and infection-free. Heathy ears can handle pressurization changes.
About 8 years ago, I wrote an article on flying with children for an expat newsletter. I later put it on a blog so that parents had access to non-commercial information from someone with both practical and professional experience on the web. Over the years I've expanded it, adding tips from parents around the world.
http://flyingwithchildren1.blogspot.com
Just be really prepared and that will be half the battle!
Have a good trip!
What can I do to ease the transition for my baby when moving house (new country)?
Q. My baby is 8 months old and our family will be making a big move soon (from my husband's home in Jakarta to my home in Australia).
Does anyone on here have experiece moving house with an infant? I've heard it can be traumatic for them.
If you have any tips I'd really appreciate them. Both in terms of the logistics of moving with an infant and in terms of helping my son adjust to the move.
Does anyone on here have experiece moving house with an infant? I've heard it can be traumatic for them.
If you have any tips I'd really appreciate them. Both in terms of the logistics of moving with an infant and in terms of helping my son adjust to the move.
A. Best thing i can offer you is set up his room the exact same way in advance, your child is young enough to realize it and be tricked at the same time. Pretend like this is a mini road trip and try to keep him on the same schedule, eventually he will transition to the new enviorment. Pack tons of toys and things to keep him busy when he is awake. ALSO here is a website my sister in law used:
http://www.moving.com/articles/handle-with-care.asp
http://www.moving.com/articles/handle-with-care.asp
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